Some of the most important friendships in my life started randomly. I’m kind of annoying in the sense that I have many best friends. I know that’s not how it traditionally works, but I’m not very traditional.
Life has a way of deciding for you. You don’t always see it coming, and you definitely don’t know in the moment what’s going to stick.
These are some of the friendships I didn’t expect.
The Friend I Made on the Bus
I was in second grade. We were going on a field trip and had assigned seats. We were told to remember where we were sitting.
I remembered mine was #4 because it’s my favorite number.
The girl I was paired with decided we needed a better system. She started chanting, “2 + 2 is 4, not 2,” and made it into a song so we wouldn’t forget.
I joined in.
She’s still one of my best friends. We’ve known each other for 35 years.
The Friend I Made in Tennessee
This one wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t decided to give a committed relationship a chance.
She’s the wife of my boyfriend’s best friend. She’s younger than me, but we have a lot in common.
We bonded over a song. She started singing “What Would You Do” by City High, and I joined in immediately, lyrics, inflection, everything.
It clicked fast.
She’s one of those friendships that feels like an anchor from this part of my life forward.
The Friend I Made in a Parking Lot
I went to check out a production I had worked on.
The parking lot was gravel, no lines, so there were volunteers directing people where to park. He was in charge, glow sticks and all.
I parked my car, and something about the interaction made me think, I need to know more about this person.
Now I’m his choreographer for his drama program.
The Friend I Made Because He Made Me Look Bad at a Meeting
He made me look bad in a meeting.
I didn’t bring a notebook or a pen. I didn’t think it was that kind of meeting.
He ripped paper out of his notebook and handed it to me. I said, “I don’t have a pen.”
He reached into his pocket and gave me one.
That should have been the end of it.
Instead, he ended up driving me to Chicago. Four hours.
We listened to The Last Five Years soundtrack, cried, and by the end of that trip, we were best friends.
It’s been 18 years.
Conclusion
It pays to be open.
I look back and think about how easily these could have gone differently. I could have been annoyed on the bus. I could have avoided that relationship. I could have skipped that performance. I could have stayed irritated after that meeting.
None of these friendships were planned.
Not all relationships are meant to last, and that’s fine.
But some of them start in the most random ways and end up mattering the most.
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